OMG.. LOL

 

I really can't believe I bought these ugly shoes. I also can't get over how bloody comfortable these shoes actually are!

 They look uncomfortable,  but that is seriously misleading as they are like walking on a cloud. 

Well maybe a bumpy cloud... LMAO!

What I learned this week...

It was a seriously annoying day. At work I am one that some folks go to for venting their anger and frustrations out. 
Not once do I ever relay their vents to a manager or supervisor because I know that they need to get that frustration and negative thoughts off their chest and out of their heart.
I listen intently and give whatever advice I feel is needed with no judgement. I simply listen and let them pour their hearts out.

I made the huge mistake of venting to the wrong person, to someone who I thought of as my friend. She in turn went and spilled my frustrations to the manager I was venting about. That manager didn't need to know what I said, it was simply a way for me to get that frustration off my heart and out of my head. Everyone needs to vent.. Right?

I am heartbroken. This person is someone whom I considered to be a good friend. That friendship is forever broken and for the life of me I will never be able to forgive her broken trust. I know she did it for her own gain to make herself seem better in the eyes of the managers, but after everything I've done for her emotionally and financially.. I'm just shattered. Her phone# is out of my phone and I'm no longer going the extra mile for her at work like I used to. 

So what have I learned this week? I learned that there are snakes in the grass at my work. They will be your friend to your face, but have no problem stabbing you in the back when it's to their own gain.

Childhood dreams that never came true.

When I was younger I had formed some childhood dreams that never came to be. 

I dreamed of being a house wife with 2 kids and a house with a white picket fence.. although now it would be a large wrought iron fence to keep the crazies out. 

I wanted a front porch that my "hubby" and I would sit on during the evening and watch the sun set before heading off to bed. 

I wanted to have a son first and then a daughter and a couple pups and cats running around with the children.

I wanted to be a writer and publish the novels that ran around in my head. I literally have at least 4 going in there right now. At night I pick one and work it out story wise until I fall asleep. A few of these novels come to me from dreams or past memories. I have so many amazing dreams that I feel the need to create stories from them at time's.

My current life at the moment is complete opposite of that childhood dream. There is no house, no hubby and no kids. There is only me sitting alone in my bedroom while my brother sleeps across the hall and my mom lays downstairs watching the blaring tv. 

I don't have the house, the hubby or the children and I'm actually OK with that. 

I know this sounds pathetic, but I don't really need them as I am content to be by myself.

 

I need to learn to love myself and care for myself better. 

I need to learn to live for myself and not solely for other's. 

I need to learn to let shit go that doesn't serve my best interests. 

I need to learn to dream again.

I do write though so I do have that. 

7am musings

The worst thing about Christmas is the holiday hours that come around at work. lol There's nothing like waking up at 5am to catch the bus at 6am in order to get to work by 7am. 

So I essentially leave when it's dark out and come home when it's dark out as well. While I love the darkness, I also enjoy some light and sunshine. 

This photo is a view from the parking lot door as the sun was rising. It was absolutely beautiful. The sky above the tree line started to fill with ribbons or yellow, pink and orangish intertwined ribbons.

I may have been feeling like a grumpy pelican at the time, but that sunrise made my morning seem so much better, because I was awake to actually see it. 

Sylvester Stallone moviethon

It's just another peaceful Sunday. I'm drinking coffee and munching on crackers. The sun is out and it's slightly cold outside. 

I have a huge list of stuff to do and at the moment I haven't even started it. lol Instead I'm watching or rather listening to "The Expendables" movies as I am online. 

There are 21 days left until Christmas arrives. I have my shopping done, all I need to do is wrap what I have and get the rest off layaway at my work. 

I am a huge fan of them and am slightly confused as to why I literally just watched them yesterday for the first time. 

I'm a big fan of Sylvester Stallone and Jason Stratham so really I should have watched these movies when they first came out, but I am not a sit in the movie theater kind of person these days. 

I haven't been to a movie theater in almost 10 years. At the moment it's more like I'm listening to the first movie like one would listen to books on tape. The next movie is Sly's Samaritan. 

Last weekend of the haunted house!

 

Coffee and lunch are out of the way and now I need to get ready for work. I'm 2 to 10 tonight so I'll be Lyfting home from work.

There is a haunted house upstairs over our store and it only ran on weekends. Tomorrow is the last day of the haunted house and I'm elated!

 I'm so glad the haunted house is leaving and we won't have to deal with it next year. 

Unwatched teenagers running, yes running, around the store, stealing and filming tik toks. 

Yeah they're just kids, I can deal with the tik toks, but not the running and stealing.

Welp I'm done for the night and it's been eventful, but I survived. I took the bus home as I was able to get a ride.  The line for the haunted house went almost up to JC Penny's, lol the store located next to us. We had a few calls from people asking if we were open because of the line and police cars in the parking lot. They thought there was a riot happening outside the store.

Cloudwatching

  

There are many things that I love about my work, but one of the best is that I have an open sky to look at while waiting for the bus to come.  I would have no problem sitting outside and staring at the clouds for hours on end. I love them!

I love looking for various shapes from animals to objects or people. I saw an angel blowing a trumpet once while in flight. The cloud formation was clear and it was easy to see what the shape was.

Mother Nature has a way of sending us messages, we just have to be smart and observant enough to look for them. 

Yup such a shame....

I love rainy days, I truly do.. especially when I'm home! This pic literally says it all about me on a rainy day. lol

I love it when the sky is dark and there is thunder and lightening rumbling through the sky. I love the wind picking up speed and blowing the trees.

I love the rain most of all. When I'm home and it's raining I'll stop what I'm doing and go stand out in the rain for a few minutes. By the time I come back inside I'm feeling refreshed and drenched.

Momma Nature knows when we need a good reminder that she's always with us. 

Well that was an awkward ride...

I took a Lyft home tonight and the driver was a bit... umm well.. I was left feeling very uncomfortable during the ride. This is the only one that I've had with Lyft before.

He started asking personal questions about myself and before I know it he's talking about taking me to Pennsylvania to flea markets, etc..  he kept turning around in his seat and swerving.

I made the mistake of mentioning that when I retire I want to get a converted a van and travel and this driver said that he had a van conversion that he got rid of and that he would travel with me. I mentioned that with him in his own van then it would work.

He asked if I was single and I said yes by choice and he said that he was 78 and that his body may look old, but he could still do everything that a man could do. He was good looking, but if he wasn't so persistent and pushy like he was then I would have most likely gone out with him on a date. 

Sooo you dropped your phone...

A woman came into the store and was looking for the T-Mobile store located in the mall. I told her where to find it and about an hour later she was walking back toward the parking lot door.

I asked her how things went and she literally told me "I dropped my phone on the ground in a puddle of water and I don't know how it got broken."

Ummm..  really you don't know how it broke? You literally dropped it in water and you don't know how it broke?? I swear some of these people really floor me.

Sunday Musings

An odd kind of summer day today.

It's a day filled with waking up at 7am with a headache, I really need new pillows mine are so uncomfortable and causing the headaches.

Besides the headache my allergies are making me sneeze and feel sleepy and that's just the meds kicking in. I have yet to find allergy pills that don't make me tired after taking them.

Any recommendations????

Last, but not least my asthma is acting up so I've been using my inhaler more than usual. I refuse to allow things to get me down there as there is so much to be done. I have a list started and really need to get to work on it.

#stillfeelingblessed

RTSonDemand Musings

 

I've been taking RTSonDemand for about 3 months now to and from work and I actually rather enjoy it especially on the way home. So far I'm 2 days into the week and on both days I've had some issues. 
The GPS is just wonky this week and it's not bringing the driver's to my scheduled destination even though I use the correct and same info each and every time. 

It's literally just this week alone so far, I've been taking the bus since I started the full time position as my hours are literally all over the place. My days of working a fixed schedule are long gone and into the abyss of yesterday and I fill in where I'm needed on the schedule.

I'll keep taking the bus of course I mean c'mon it's only a $1 per ride, but they really need to update their app and update their GPS. 

Van life dreams revisited

 

Every time I ride the RTSonDemand van to and from work I feel the urge to go straight into van life and not go into an apartment as I had been thinking about doing. 

 

It's still not a safe time to start van life here in NY with all of the attacks in the mall parking lot and the shootings so the crime rate in the US is rather high at the moment and I'm NOT looking to be a victim. 

 

I refuse to live my life in fear of what could happen to me if I lived in a van, but I don't want to put my life in danger by doing something at the wrong time. 

 

So I'll be building up my savings to use toward buying something that is fully built out and I won't have much to do except move things into the van. 

 

That's what I'll be using my Marcus account for, to save for getting a built out van. My taxes will go into the van fund and once I get enough saved up I can move into one and live my dreams of vanlife. This way I'll also have the means of transportation and can travel on the days off.

It's laundry day.. so many socks!!

 

The next time I move there will be a washer and drier accessible in the complex or I'll have a washer at least. I don't mind hanging my clothes up to dry on a drying rack in front of an open window.

At the moment I'm handwashing clothes and hanging them on a drying rack and on hooks around my room to dry. Valley Brook Townhomes has a few townhomes that have washer and dryer hook ups, but not all of them do. The one I live in has no hook ups. 

So I tend to hand wash my clothes in the bathroom sink every week so I have my work clothes ready for me to use during the week. I have neglected a lot of other clothes so my goal for this 2 day weekend is to get all of my clothes washed, or most of them. 

I have sooo much socks that I really don't need to buy any more. I have at last 50 pairs that need to be washed. I always bought socks when there were 10 pairs for $1.99 after being marked down. Great deal ya know and you can't have too many socks... or so I thought because I have far too many pairs of socks! 

Workin the night shift!

Tonight was my first night shift at work in over 10 years and it was a doozey. Also Burlington has been running strong for 50 years! Woot!

A guy came in and was looking at luggage. He was upset that all of the ones he liked had women's names on them. He said he couldn't get them because he didn't want his girl to think he was cheating on her with someone named "Juicy" or "Nicole". I just stood there with a confused look on my face and had to walk away. I seriously just don't understand people these days.

We had two people come in 5 minutes before the store closed to shop. We were all literally ready to leave and they wanted to shop! The guy comes in every night and does this. Every night. We ended up not getting out until 10:15 because of them. You would think that if the doors are locked then the store is closed.

Nothing like eating a dinner of ramen noodles at 11pm. I had a pepperoni pretzel at work around 4:30 so it was considered more of a snack.

Active Shooter training tips

 

As the full time person on the asset protection team I have had to do some training. Well we all did it to be honest, but I tend to do a wee bit more. There have been quite a few active shooters as of late in stores and I will admit that it scares me.

Personally I carry pepper spray on me at all times. I need to get new spray because what I have is over 10 years old, but for now it will do. 

The thought of it happening at my work to coworkers and really scary and I will admit to having nightmares about it. During the training that I watched they gave some great instructions and I'm going to share them here.

In case of an active shooter the first thing you need to do is RUN! If you can get to an exit or emergency exit then do so. Grab everyone you can and go! Once you're outside then call the police. 

If you can't run then you need to HIDE! Do not hide in large groups because you will be spotted easier that way. Hide in breakrooms, bathrooms, offices. Hide in clothing racks and anywhere else you can find a spot. 

If there is a large group of you then you can FIGHT! Grab anything you can get your hands on, slam into them hard with shopping carts, grab fixtures and hit them. Do what you can to get the weapon away from them. 

When the police do come into the building then put your hands up and follow their instructions. 

There are flaws in every plan, but with everything that's happening here in NY as of late it's better to know what to do than to not and be sorry.

Snow day!

Yesterday my work closed because of the weather. we got loads of snow and half of the employees called out, so they just decided to close the store. 

This is very rare indeed, but the powers that be who are in charge of NY did say to stay off the roads due to the snowstorm that we were in the process of getting. I'm glad the company I work for actually put the welfare of their employees over their love of making money. 

I called out today because among other things, the weather was supposed to get worse and the complex that I live in never plowed the parking lot so it's difficult to get in and out of the parking lot.

I'm trying to stay awake.

I had insomnia last night and was up all night long. I just couldn't sleep last night at all. I'm not sure why either. I tend to have these kinds of nights on nights when I don't have work the next day so this one is very rare.

Now I'm forcing myself to stay awake until 7:30ish and then I'll go to bed after taking allergy pills.  I'm hoping that if I take the allergy pills then I'm able to sleep through the night.

Markdowns are being done in the ladies' accessories and all shoes! I marked down a lot of purses and wallets! We also have a ton of Christmas stuff in and Christmas music playing on the overhead!

Memories : Roasting Marshmallows

When my nieces were small, they used to come to Aunt Lisa daycare. We would spend the entire day outside in the backyard and do crafts and roast marshmallows and cook hotdogs over my fire pit. Our summer routine would consist of them coming over and running upstairs to wake me up.

Then I'd get dressed and have a cup of coffee while they had breakfast and by 10am we were in the backyard, and they were playing with the backyard toys.

I always tried to have marshmallows and hot dogs on hand because they loved cooking them and even though they rarely ate the marshmallows they loved to roast them. They made sure to burn them just the way I liked them.

I had a picnic basket that I kept everything in. The Sunday paper went in there to use as fire kindling and the roasting tongs would go in there as well as a box of matches. The girls had the job of collecting the firewood in the yard, luckily there was some broken logs that I was able to use in the fire, so they were just collecting kindling. We used dry leaves and pinecones as kindling as well.

One side of the outdoor table would be set up with a few crafts and the other had the picnic basket and my coffee. lol

Around noon the hotdogs come out and then the marshmallows. By the time my sister comes for them both girls will have each had a tube of Pringles, 2 hotdogs and maybe 3 marshmallows and a bottle of juice. 

Our roasting methods are different... 

I just put the marshmallow on the stick and put it over the fire, turning it periodically. 
Morgs does the same thing only she pushes it down do the tong went all the way through and would just spin it in circles.
Mads pushed her on slowly and made sure it was sturdy enough and then she would put it over the fire and pull it out and then put it back in. This happened at least 3 or 4 times.

Tonight's Dumpster Adventures!

Just got back from the dumpster and there's something weird goin on there! As I got closer I noticed a car parked across from said dumpster with the head lights on.

Then once I was like 15 steps from the dumpster the car literally turned around so that the occupants couldn't be seen and the head and tail lights went out.

With my trusty 20+ year old pepper spray in my hand I went to the dumpster and tossed out the garbage and headed back.

This woman was heading there with some garbage {nice to know I'm not the only one who does it at night LOL} and I told her about what I saw.

She yelled "Honey let's go for a walk!" and next thing I know her honey in a police uniform came over and they walked together toward the dumpster.

I have two thought's about what could be going on, but in all actuality I think I'd rather not deal with any mental images this close to bedtime.